virginal happiness

I sometimes believe that I should have been cancer instead of saggi? The way I retreat into my cave, dreaming,researching,studying subject matter that fascinates me and stimulates me,always seeking for the answers of the complex mind and heart, understanding the mind's of others, trying to make sense of this crazed maze, and finding out what truly matters when perspective is brought forward.With the global catastrophe happening right now and people close to me being diagnosed with cancer, I have an innate sadness that makes me feel helpless.My once monumental issues,quickly dissolve to dust.

I feel that human spirit and compassion and less self seeking will truly make a change to the world we are experiencing, and more now than ever before we can lend a hand to the souls that need our love,  a selfless kind of loving compared to a self seeking kind of love you find in snagging the latest Louis Vuitton. NOw there is nothing wrong with retail therapy but I just think its unwarranted extravagance that we can do without. Living in a material world as we know it, one can get clouded very quickly. I don't feel that Cape town is any less pretentious than Hollywood......I am constantly surrounded by the idea of materialism and fame, and I wish to find truth in it all and not be a victim to the idea of  the happiness that all that would bring me. I have been recognizing that all those ideas could very well be the illusion of the mind and that coming into alignment with a higher consciousness and my own true vibration, would be the only way to virginal happiness and being inside my own vortex would allow me to fulfill the potential of truly being present for another human being.....